Despite everyone's advice, I decided to confront my X and it felt great. I think it was the closure that I've been needing for so long.
he was on facebook chat and he responded to my message and we actually had a conversation and I let him have it! His excuses make me realize what a headcase he is
I asked him why he's been such a stranger and if he ever plans to be a friend. He said that he still likes to keep to himself and most of the time he feels like hanging out with girlfriend when he hangs out with anyone. I told him that there's no reason for him to have completely ignored me when he came into town that he left this void and left me with so many unanswered questions. He said that he does that to everyone. I said: but it's different if you were intimate with them. You just can't do that. I asked him if he ever plans to make time for me and he said "of course" and I said, like when? He said he doesn't know, his mind changes from day to day. I told him that I put a lot of time and care into our relationship and the fact that he never gave me any kind of answers and pretended like you and I never happened was hurtful. He never gave me the answers to move on. That is what I needed. So can he please tell me why we went from being great friends one week and then the next week you stop talking to me and pretend like he and I never happened? Did you even care for me or was it all just nothing? I do not think he deals with confrontation well, so he probably wont respond, but at least I got it off my chest. That was eating me up for a while. I do realize more than ever that he is impossible. He is going to be a handful for anyone really and I highly doubt that his relationship with his girlfriend will last judging by the complexity of his problems.
So, I know that was not what everyone recommended I do, but it is something that I needed to do for myself. The truth is that I know the answer to that question, I just want to hear it from him. I want to hear that he thought it was best that we dont continue because of the complexity of the situation, his relationship with his girlfriend, etc. I just deserve that because of how close we were... eventhough it never will be that way again. I decided to say this to him when I realized that I could never be his friend again. Now I am sure that I don't want to be his friend anymore because hes a headcase. I realize this person is IMPOSSIBLE. He really has NO IDEA what he did. He's completely mental and his response is clear that he lacks all insight. Anyway, I've vented and now I'm better. I do realize that my efforts are wasted with him, but I just needed that one last conversation for closure...and now I like him even less.